Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My grumpy mind

Have you ever had days where you're just not yourself?
I have truly been a grump for these last few days. I have found myself being someone I don't want to be around, and that's not really a good thing. If I'm not mad because someone cut me off on the road, I'm upset because a situation didn't turn out to suit me quite right. I've been getting annoyed at the littlest things, some of which are beyond my control, but some that are.
Writing a blog is personal, so I will share a little why I've been grumpy. I have a lot of physical pain and lately it's been really bad. I woke up one morning last week literally screaming because I hurt so badly. I had to go to the doctor in Dallas today and he's adjusting some medications, but it makes me nervous to be on such heavy medications that have serious side affects. I think my pain, coupled with my frustration about my health, have made me feel grumpy. Some might say that it's okay to have these feelings, but inside I know it's not. I have to control my feelings of anger and frustration or they will consume me and eat me up inside. I have to count my blessings in spite of what is going on with me physically.
So I've decided tonight to give myself a little kick in the rear end by listing 20 things I am thankful for right off the spot. I want to list them randomly and quickly, and maybe I can take the focus off of myself and think about what is good about my life.
So here it goes. My 20 things I am thankful for as I lay in my bed blogging!
1. My mommy and daddy
2. Good friends who tell the truth.
3. Fall weather and being able to wear a jacket
4. Watching football on TV with my husband
5. Praise and Worship music
6. Candy corn and those little candy pumpkins.
7. My adopted Grandfather, Mr. Kelso.
8. Staying in touch with old friends via facebook.
9. Art of any kind
10. Listening to my niece's voice on the phone message machine
11. Kissing my puppy dog on the nose
12. Being able to sing and praise God
13. Being able to eat soft foods
14. My country
15. My sisters
16. A good honorable man for a husband
17. Marshmallows
18. Digital pictures
19. Freedom
20. for people who don't give up on you
These are just the top things that came quickly to my mind. I am sure that I could list so much more, but I just wanted to remind myself quickly of all I have to be thankful for so that I could stop being so negative. A lot of my negativity comes from my mind and I'll dwell on my pain if I'm not careful. So I'm pulling myself out of the grumpy mode, and every time that I'm negative, I will write down my blessings as a way to say thanks to God for His hand on my life.

Friday, September 17, 2010


A good friend recently wrote on her Facebook the following quote from Warren Wiersbe: "If something can not be done to the glory of God, than we can be sure it must be out of the Will of God." I Corinthians 10:32.
That struck me like a ton of bricks. I am rarely awed and stunned by something someone says. I mean, I usually hear things and they go over my head. But this. This struck me and made me think. I actually had to peel myself off of the floor almost by the impact.
I guess I say this because I have been struggling with some things in my life, and even though I have been praying and seeking God, I haven't put things as simply as this.
Sometimes I think I tend to over-complicate my walk with God. This quote just broke that down. Basically if what I'm doing doesn't bring glory to God, than it's not right. It's not God's will. It's crazy to think that it's that simple. If I live my life to where I'm just honest and I just really cut through all of the mess and say, if it doesn't bring glory to God, then I'm not going to do it.
That goes for what I watch on TV.
For what I say to others - privately and publicly.
For what I listen to.
For how I act when people are around or they aren't.
For all aspects of my life.
If it doesn't bring glory to the Lord, why do it? Why say it? Why live it?
I can do many things. I can paint. I can write. I can sing. But if I can't do them for the glory of God, then I shouldn't be doing them.
Wow!It's so powerful to realize just how simple the Christian life is supposed to be. Why do we over-complicate and muddle it all up.
I really have some re-examining of my life to do.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

The Bad Cat

My cat is possessed.
Or just really bad.
I don't know what to do with her. She thinks she rules the house. I don't know how to get her to understand that it is my house and she just lives here.
I catch her taking her paws and scooping out her food, dropping it on the table, and then dropping it onto the floor so she can bat it around. She plays with it and I am left to sweep it up.
Then my poor dogs...she terrorizes them. They walk by and she smacks them in the head. She kicks them out of their doggy beds so she can sit there. It's pathetic.
I never thought that a 2 year old cat could run a household just because she has claws. Don't get me wrong...I love my sweet Smoopy cat. She's lively and she's just what I always wanted, but I don't like how she rules the roost.
I have a feeling that this house will be run by a cute little furry black cat for a long time to come...

Saturday, September 11, 2010

Stepping into Art

I am so excited because I am planning to take this art class in October. It's a 6 week art class and it's called art journaling. It combines art forms with writing. I am comfortable writing, but I'm not so sure how I feel about my skills as an artist. I am so anxious to see just how I can do.
It's fun in life to press yourself to do things you normally wouldn't. I never imagined in a million years that I might have a talent at art, but after taking a one-night painting course, I painted this beautiful picture. It boosted my confidence and inspired me to do more. I can't WAIT to take this next course.
I believe that God has given us talents and what we do with them is up to us. Just think about life and the beauty that God gave us to enjoy. I hope that by trying my hand at something new, I can uncover a talent that might inspire or uplift someone else.
I can't wait to take the class. If any of my Texarkana friends are interested in taking the course, you should go to or message me on this blog. It is going to be an amazing and inspiring class!
Stepping out of your comfort zone is what life is all about. I hope you'll step out and really discover more about yourself, just like I am doing.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

My home

Well, I am FINALLY home.
I have never traveled so much in such a short time.
From Texas to Maryland to Virginia back to Maryland back to Virginia back to Maryland to Pennsylvania back to Maryland back to Texas. Then once I got back to Texas I went on another trip to my sister-in-law's house 2 1/2 hours away.
It's funny how much you miss but don't realize you miss until you come back.
Like I didn't realize how much I'd miss my bed. I have never had such a good sleep until I got home. I don't think I moved once last night. I woke up and my back felt better and I just felt rested.
And my mirror. Putting on my makeup was great. I didn't realize the difference my mirror makes. I mean, it doesn't make me look better(I wish!), but I could put on my makeup faster and the lighting was perfect.
Of course, it's nice to have the things you like at your fingertips...the kinds of foods and your favorite chair to sit in.
But most of all it's nice to have the one you love.
On my trip I got to see many people that I mom, my dad, my sisters and my best friend. I got to see my adopted grandfather and church friends, all of whom are incredibly important to me.
But I missed my husband. It felt so good to be wrapped up in his arms this morning. Something about his hug is home. He is my home. I don't like home without him. Home isn't home unless He's there.
He is my home, and I can only wish everyone in their lifetime could have a home as wonderful as mine.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Leaving Maryland Tomorrow

Getting ready to go home tomorrow. I am sad but happy to see my husband. I love him and am excited to be with him again.
However, I can't begin to account for the many fun mornings I had coffee with my parents and the times I laughed with my sisters.
I love my family. If I didn't have such a great family, leaving wouldn't be so hard.
Some people can't wait to get away from their family. I can't wait to see mine and hear from them every day.
Boy have I been blessed...